June 2013
I'm sure your new sprayable moisturizer is great for my dry skin, Vaseline. But let's be real. Can I use it for anal?
learningtostay said: YOU CAN’T BLOG JOKES THAT YOU TOLD ME, THAT’S SOME FORM OF CHEATING. ASSHOLE.
HOW IS IT CHEATING!? ARE MY JOKES IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!?
Imagine if you went to see The Great Gatsby, and in it, Jay Gatsby was a black swiss novelist living in Mongolia.
That’s how much The Man of Steel took a giant shit on its source material.
Read receipts, man. Killin' mah self esteem.
How the fuck does someone go see Dave Matthews Band 47 fucking times?
Hold My Liquor
Kanye West
Hold My Liquor - Kanye West
“You have not lived until you’ve rolled over to post-coital Krispy Kremes. That’s what being an American is all about.”
—Edward Snowden, in an online comment several years ago. Read this profile. (via washingtonpoststyle)
due to low self esteem if someone is hitting on me i probably wouldn’t even be able to tell unless they directly said “i love you and want to date you” and even then i would be a little skeptical
“
There were thirst and hunger, and you were the fruit.
There were grief and the ruins, and you were the miracle.
Ah woman, I do not know how you could contain me
in the earth of your soul, in the cross of your arms!
“I think I’m ready to listen to something not Yeezus.” I think to myself, while listening to Yeezus.
Okay, so Rhode Island Pride was kind of a bust. Let's not do that again.
psychiatrist-cannibal by day
pop-star singing sensation by night
hannibal montannibal
Yeezus is one of the best albums I have ever heard.
“I’m a pervert, but in a romantic way.”
—Julie Delpy (via jolieing)
“I was born in the wrong generation!” I scream as I churn my own butter and marry my cousin
I'm sorry, Nicki Minaj is adorable, and if you don't think so you're wrong.
